Sunday, February 15, 2015

HP 9000 Superdomes Falling From Sky

I started work at a new site today.

Looked over in the corner. Now know the entire HP 9000 Superdome series by heart. Recognized a top-of-the-line model gathering dust. Could glance at the back and see it was fully stocked with all accessory boards and several processors. Looked like one hardcore machine.

Had to mention it.

"You want that, mate? It is fully kitted out, we don't know what to do with it. We replaced it with an even newer version now as our server. It is stacked, so fast you wouldn't believe it. We were going to yank the drives out and toss it."

I don't know what I did to deserve all these blessings but I am grateful.

Another one?!? This Neanderthal idiot leads a charmed life!
You think you're better than me?!? Do you think you're better than me?!?


Sam said...

I looked that up and if this is it,

Then it's just unbelievable. It's unbelievable people just trash stuff like this. You have one hell of a personal computer.

You could take this thing and be an instant server business...but ...I guess they probably said you couldn't compete with them.

Thing is...just what would you do with it. It's like having a F-15 in your back yard. It amazing but what would you do with it?

Maybe you simulate all the weather in Australia?

Ave said...

The spirit of Dwight Eisenhower is upon you : you have to recreate NORAD on a decentralized local scale.

The future survival of mankind (that is your family and the three weirdoes who live two miles away from you, who by accident were less zombified than the rest of the sheeple) depends upon you.


It is the plan of the Evil Schemers to lead you astray with this shiny technology, thus preventing you from finishing a simple vault operating system that anybody could run from something as simple as a Raspberry Pi ( ;-) )

Luke said...

Theoretical quantum physicist Dr. Amit Goswami admits he and his peers have "no fucking idea" what they are doing:

“Over the years there have been just a handful of us pretending to know something about the universe that no one else does,” he went on. “But this is all lies to feed the charade. I’ve had some great times during the years; travelling the world, and giving talks on our pretend finds.”

"Me and the handful that know the truth have been riding the Quantum Physicist celebrity wave for quite some time now..."

Luke said...

Whoops that was actually an Irish satirical news site.

cbenediccengi said...

Read the comments section. we can't be far off now.

Ave said...


It also raises question about the company's procurement strategy...

KW Jackson said...

I just want to understand this correctly: did you say it was fully loaded with all expansion slots filled?

Edward said...

Well we have to hope that it's just satire, but really most of us have no way of telling for sure about the existence or behaviour of anything much smaller than an atom. Well we know that modern CPUs etc have components that are sufficiently small that they have to take quantum effects into account in the design process, but again it's so remote from most people's experience that we've no idea how things really work at that scale, we just that the newest iPhone CPU is pretty small, pretty powerful, and pretty energy efficient, and the rest is taken mostly on trust.

Texas Arcane said...

@KW Jackson

Yes. They have to pull the drives from it for security reasons but otherwise it is a fully loaded machine, I think it is 16 clusters.

Russell said...

Tex, you're going to need your own power plant!

Grognard said...

Looks like you will be the modern day irish monk who protects the writings of western civilization while the barbarians wipe out everything they can find, as happened once before.

Edward said...

Your gonna need to buy an awful lot of new hard drives to protect the writings of civilisation these days. Of course the really hard task will be in deciding which of the writings are really worth your protection. Good luck with that!

scipio afircanus said...


Why don't you like Batman? Is he an archetypal melonhead phony hero?


Texas Arcane said...


I have a protracted rivalry with an imaginary comic book character with repeated public slurs against each other as we battle it out in press conferences.

Of course I love Batman. He's the greatest. You are aware I am just spoofing, right? Expect at least 25% of what you read on Vault-Co to be hyperbole for laughs.

Matthew Richter said...

'Looks like you will be the modern day irish monk who protects the writings of western civilization while the barbarians wipe out everything they can find, as happened once before.'

pfft, Tex and ten million other 'advanced' digital monks. No disrespect intended Cleve.

scipio afircanus said...


I figured it was spoofing. Batman is sort of a Neanderthal. His family killed by a crazed cromagnon, lives in a cave, super intelligent, hated by the powers that be, and so on