Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Krapture This Saturday

Awfully good of Harold Camping to make it on the weekend so people can sleep in before they lift off. Of course, God says no man knows the day and the rapture is only something hinted at in the Bible, but Harold knows better.

Here's the point of this blog post.

Every single time in history, right before a nation has plummeted into a total collapse, people have embraced doctrines of millennialism in the hope they were going to escape the rugged hardships it was obvious they were going to have to bear. When it turned out that the miracle weapons of the Fuhrer were just pipe dreams or the cavalry wasn't coming, there was always a colossal outbreak of violence following that as people awoke the next morning to find their schizophrenic fantasy had not come to pass as prophesied.

There are a lot of people in the country formerly known as the United States that are clinging very hard to this last, desperate fantastic hope. If they don't get kraptured on Saturday away from their unserviceable mortgages and endless search for jobs in an economy that has no jobs to offer and probably won't for the next 100 years or thereabouts, there will be an atomic personality meltdown for a lot of people. For every person actively in the streets handing out pamphlets, there are forty silent ones with their fingers crossed. Saturday is all they have left. After that, it's the abyss and part of them knows it subconsciously. Everybody knows the U.S. is getting ready to default. That's going to open a sh*tstorm in the Kwa the likes of which ordinary folks don't have sufficient imagination to comprehend. The average person just can't take it anymore. If Harold Camping did not exist it would have been necessary to invent him. It's not that he ever had any credibility, it's that he was making the right predictions at the right time. It's what a lot of people wanted to hear as they were becoming slowly aware they had nothing left. The U.S. is a dried up, sucked out shriveled shell of a country and where it's going, it won't be coming back from, ever.

So Vault-Co, no prophet to be sure, is going on the record with a prediction of our own.

I reckon Monday morning of next week, the seeds of serious civil unrest will have been laid down irrevocably in the Kwa. They'll be thinking ... nearly 8:30, I'm supposed to be in the unemployment line waiting for another form to apply for benefits. Oh God, why hast thou forsaken me? This can't be happening.

From the underclass of societies this precariously perched, there is a sickening feeling present in all the inhabitants that one feels on a rollercoaster about to make it's first drop. That anticipation will bring out the madness in the Kwanstain. Vault-Co predicts it.

No rapture for you, kids. You must think that you're in good standing with God. No such luck. You are an accursed nation and now you should prepare yourself to pass through a terrible fire. There's no wunderwaffen waiting in the wings for you. During the Great Depression, the madhouses filled up with people driven to lunacy by despair. That was nothing compared to the trials that are coming for the Kwa.


Anonymous said...

Mr T

I thought it would happen in '08; seemed that urban centers would go up in a close election ... but wait ! ... 'Bongo won !

There are any number of triggers stalking the landscape now. Pick one. But I don't think the coming and going of some VooDoo religioBS will be it. Monday the Chongos and Chongas will still be doing their troopy thang. Hell, Tiny Tim just raided fed retirement accounts [ by not funding as per law] and nary a peep from the troop. Too complex .... not American Idol level velveeta for their brainpans.

Your take on the landscape from altitude is spot on, I just don't think Monday's gonna be THE event. Meanwhile, we Prepare Accordingly


j said...

That's an insightful take on this rapture craze. I was content to just snicker at them, but, after reading this post, all the laughter has died in my heart. This blog is good for that.

Anonymous said...

I can hardly wait for the stories in the coming weeks, telling the sad tales of these rapture morons who gave all their stuff away.

At least they didn't have to take a weekday off from work.

There must be quite a few of them because they were able to pay for all those billboards up and down the East Coast.

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