Saturday, July 11, 2009

Ice Age II : Babies, The Other White Meat

I cannot emphasize the importance of packing it, campers. I cannot emphasize it enough. A second Ice Age means our current drive-through culture will be slamming to a halt rather abruptly. It's hard for a lot of people to imagine what it is that is being talked about. After three days without food it will be perfectly clear to them but that won't do them any good then.

When we say a second Ice Age, sure, we're referring to merciless cold ... but what is really being talked about is a famine of such apocalyptic dimensions it will boggle the mind. If you think modern people are a**holes now, wait until they get hungry. They're going to be the scariest and most cunning fast-moving cannibals you have ever seen outside of a George Romero movie.

WE ARE IN THE FIRST YEAR OF WHAT WILL BE A MINIMUM OF 300 YEARS OF EXTRAORDINARY COOLING. It wouldn't be so bad if this was the Medieval era and we were all farmers under feudalism. We could hang in there. Alas, 99% of the population in the Western world doesn't understand any food that does not come out a teller window in a paper bag. The idea of "hanging in there" is kind of irrelevant in their frame of reference.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You may have already seen this, but it's a vision of America a few years from now. (The optimistic Disney edition)